JD and I are fighting now. The good thing is that it gives me some inspiration for writing this blog I had in mind for already a few weeks. The bad thing is, we are at the French countryside, I don’t know anyone here, cooperating is difficult now and I guess dinner tonight is not going to be that delightful. We share everything together; job, living, traveling, doing fun things. The highs are high but because everything is centered around us two a disconnection affects all fronts. Being a digital nomad couple doesn’t feel that good right now. But tomorrow it will. Probably..
A little while ago I gave you a tasty introduction to the wonderful world of the digital nomad. This time I will reveal you the juicy details of how the life of a digital nomad COUPLE looks like. Can look like.
Spicy anecdote to show how nice the life of a digital nomad couple can be
I am talking about a week last February. I am vacuum cleaning the house we are sitting in the far South of Spain and suddenly I realize ‘I love my life!’. I feel so inspired, this year I get to know Europe more thoroughly because we are traveling Europe by house sitting in different EU countries. I am learning online and I am learning offline. And I can share all this with JD my love and business partner in one man.
< scroll down for an overview of all advantages and challenges of being a traveling couple >
Past week I have been working on an ebook that we are going to use as a free offer for our brand new Dutch personal development project. JD dove into technical stuff to find out which marketing tools we are going to use. Today is the BIG cleaning day before the owners return back home from their holiday in Thailand.
The one thing I like about cleaning, are the reflections that automatically come up. Memories, wishes, insights and a lot more. During cleaning I process my experiences, and the future and the past pass by. I have the same sensation during jogging. Everything falls in place, without focusing, naturally. I feel happy.
We spontaneously decide; we are at a great place in Spain; let’s celebrate holiday
We have been working quite focused last weeks. Tomorrow evening we move to another house sit. But just for 8 days this time. The home is nicely located next to a private forest and close to the beach. With three awesome dogs. After the sit we are flying to the Netherlands to celebrate the wedding of good friends. We decide to just celebrate holiday during this 8-day house sit. And so we do.
We drink coffee in the morning in the sun. Walk in the shady forest. On Thursday we jump in the car that is at our disposal and we drive to ‘gorge-village’ Ronda. We have fun. As always the journey is nicer than the destination (sorry Ronda). We can do this on a normal Thursday because we are a digital nomad COUPLE!
Being a digital nomad couple advantages
#1 We learn together
Thanks to cooperating we grow as a team and as a couple. We learn together. Being together stays interesting. Because we share so much it is not an option at all to avoid things. We always start the dialogue.
#2 Couple freedom
Being digital nomad gives a lot of freedom. We can go where we want to go. And now we have this advantages as a couple as well. I want to live where JD lives. When just one of us would work online, and the other in an offline office, we couldn’t benefit flexibility as a couple. Nor as an individual. Because the first thing I want is being with him.
#3 I like it together
I like this way of living because we do it together. I wouldn’t live this way when I was on my own. Then I would make different choices. I am the kind of person that likes to share things and likes to chat. Most often I gain new insights because we and myself are sharing things out loud. And not in my own world. I know, learning to be better at being alone would be nice for me.
#4 Designing a lifestyle with all parts integrated
We develop our vision together. And gradually shape our lives together. The starting point is not making money. The starting point is not making money online. Nor traveling full time. The starting point is shaping the way of living that suits us best. And since living involves both working & earning and relations & hobbies; work & play; work & private life; I like to design my life as a whole.
#5 Two know more than one
Because we work together, we reinforce each other and learn from each other.
#6 The wallet is happy too
Not the most romantic advantage. Traveling and just living is way more affordable as a couple than as a single person.
This was the fairy tale part of our life as a digital nomad couple. Get some coffee or another drink, and get ready for the dark side..
Dramatic anecdote what it is like to be a digital nomad couple
Back to our fighting. We were walking the dog this morning. Our temporary French home is right next to the pilgrimage route that leads to Santiago de Compostella. We decide to walk a small part of the route. The day promises good things to come.
JD likes to discuss our new Dutch project. He got an idea. I don’t agree with the idea and feel like it is going to delay the launch. JD feels like I am not open to his idea and that I have resistance. Subsequently we end up in a big squabble over probably small things but it feels big. And it feels big the whole day. We are not able to make up until the afternoon. My energy leaks away. I can’t discuss work related things because we are not on speaking terms. My friends are far away. It can be a lonely world when we fight, this digital nomad COUPLE, in the French countryside.
Being a digital nomad couple challenges
#1 Just the two of us, also when we fight
When we fight there is not easily distraction or a friend close by. We live in the same house, and sometimes a small house. We don’t have any other place to go to. We have to deal with each other, always. Because we are moving all the time we are not really building a local network. Although we hang out with people in most places.
#2 A negative loop
When we disagree on something business wise it also reflects on us privately. It is all the same. We can’t switch suddenly. Struggling as business partners, automatically means struggling as lovers, and struggling as mates. And vice versa. I don’t close the office door at 18 o’clock to leave those frustrating colleagues behind me for the night.
#3 One cornerstone
Everything is built on us together. When we would break up – hypothetically – EVERYTHING changes. Because everything we do now is built on US. Rationally you could see this as a high risk. I don’t think this way. But it is a risk in the end.
#4 Different languages, but we must communicate
We are together because we fell for each other. Not because we worked so well together. Sometimes – and even quite often in business – we speak a different language. We really had to learn to cooperate effectively together. To make things less personal. Giving each other slack and accept the differences. To listen better and acknowledge the other. That was a process that costed a lot of energy and struggle at times. And we are still not perfect at cooperating.
PS we made up in the evening, and had to laugh about our silly day in silence.
Questions to you
- Can you work together with your partner?
- Which advantages and disadvantages do you experience as a digital nomad couple?
- What are your tips to make this way of living work as partners?
- How can we help you with starting as a digital nomad couple?
Keep us noticed. We are curious to learn! Thanks for your comments, questions or ideas.
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